Stick with your statement and if the bully violates your space, move on to confrontation. You cannot allow the bully to get away with the behavior even one more time or the groundwork you so carefully laid is wasted. Confronting a bully is scary and hard. The ground that you can take away. Or end the call. Keep up your game and by the second or third attempt, Bulldozer will tire of spinning his treads in the sand.
This confrontational approach works in meetings , too. If the bully is talking over you with complaints and criticisms, ask him a direct question about what he recommends instead. Put the bully on the spot instead of responding to the complaints and criticism.
If he refuses, end the meeting and reschedule the meeting without him. You need to call out the bully on your terms. Anytime you are feeling bullied or experiencing bullying behavior, document the date, time, and details of the incident. Note if another employee witnessed the incident. If you eventually seek help from Human Resources, documentation, especially documentation of the bully's impact on business results and success, gives HR the information they need to work with on your behalf.
The bully is not just hurting your feelings; the bully is sabotaging the business's success. If the bullying occurs in email, texts, or correspondence, maintain a hard copy of the trail of emails and texts and file them in a folder on your computer. If you decide to press charges in the future, you need to have witnesses and dated documentation. Note whether the bully pulls the same behavior with your coworkers.
This will help you build a stronger case for your organization to take action. If five of you experience the bullying and five of your coworkers document the bullying, then you build a case to which HR and your management can respond on solid ground.
They need evidence and witnesses, even if everyone knows, that the bully is a bully. Help your HR staff help you. But, these numbers are on the rise with the notoriety that bullying has gained. It's time to get help. Go to HR or your manager with your evidence, especially the evidence that demonstrates the impact of the bully on the business, and file a formal complaint.
Most employee handbooks describe the HR investigation process that your complaint sets in motion. Hope for the best resolution when you ask management and HR for assistance in dealing with the bully, but be prepared to explore other options so you have less contact with the bully. You may even need to find a new job. You may never know what HR did about the bully; his or her privacy and confidentiality are also a priority. But, you can assess the impact of HR and management's actions by how the bully now treats you after presumably, they have made an intervention.
You can address the behavior of a bully in your workplace. When you do report it, try to stay calm and not let your emotions take over too much. You could write down what you want to say before the meeting so that you have something to focus on. You should be supported by your management when you have reported these incidents.
If the person you want to report is a person of authority, then the company will have a policy of who to report to. Surround yourselves with supportive people, whether that be co-workers, family or friends.
It is important to talk about what you are experiencing with others who you can trust. You may even feel like you need to find support in the form of counselling. Bullying can have a serious effect on your mood and self-esteem that can lead to depression.
If you are feeling depressed, then you should seek professional help. Although this is easier said than done, it is a very important factor.
When someone is bullying you it is more about them than you. They are often acting this way from a place of jealousy or insecurity. It is proven that victims of bullying in the workplace tend to the high performers that are doing well at work. Practice reminding yourself that it is not about you. It needs to stop to prevent to stop any long term effects of bullying. The relative impact of workplace bullying as a social stressor at work.
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